Up, down, up, down, sideways and back down again. It might be a rejection, it might be a critique. It might be a comment. Or a story that just doesn't work. Or one that does. A publisher who says yes. A robot who says no. I find this writing life to be like a crazy, wild roller coaster.
Up there is a photo of some of my published books. One would think I could look at those and think- okay, I've accomplished a lot. I'm not a complete hack. I should be happy. But it doesn't work that way. For me it's about two things 1) where I am today and 2) where I want to be tomorrow. What I've done is, well, done. Today I'm a bit stuck. Not quite started on a new project, not having any smaller jobs to distract me from my bigger problem. So today's not one of the good days.
I've known manic depressives in my life and I always thought if I was ever one I would not take medication. I would accept the depressed times so that I could still have the manic times. And it's like that with writing I think. I'm in a bit of a depressed time right now, but I know it won't last for ever. Out there are those glorious moment when things will be perfect. Those crazy wonderful moments. I've had a few.
You sit down at the computer and the story comes to you like it's been waiting your entire life. Or you get mentioned in a newsletter with a writer you really respect. Or you attend a prize giving where you win. Or a publisher tells you they're so keen you sent them a manuscript.Or you finally understand the plot of your latest book you've been fighting with.
Up and down and up and down. The writing life is a bit exciting like that. Sometimes not so nice, but always exciting.
I think what you've described, the depressive state, the writer's block, etc., is what paralyzes many "would be" writers from ever starting. I say 'kudos' to you for having accomplished so much. Even if you have many more goals to accomplish look at how far you've come. Merry Christmas to you and your household :-)
ReplyDeleteThanks Joyful. Happy holidays to you and youre family too!
ReplyDeleteYup, yup, yup, I hear you. But you're right, we need the downs because the ups are sweeter, and thank goodness we know they will pass, as all things do. Sorry, a little philosophical there! Happy holidays to you and here's to a sweet 2014. X
ReplyDeleteThanks Tania. Hope you have a lovely end of year and 2014 is full of magical wonderful surprises!!
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