Apologies to my readers for hardly blogging at all last week. I've had visitors from the United States; a friend from high school and university and his partner. We were busy remembering and laughing and having a huge pile of fun. It's always a bit bittersweet when people visit me here. I know it's very expensive for them to get to Botswana and when they leave I know they'll not likely visit again and we may never see each other again either. So it was lovely, but tinged with sadness.
The other bit that is filling my mind right now is a job. My husband is currently living about 200 km from me in the capitol city of Gaborone attending university. He doesn't like living alone. Also the government pays him his full salary for the first year of school, but for the second and third year he goes on half salary. We can survive on that, but my writing income is not always as steady as I would like it to be so some months it could be tight. So on the weekend there was a good job in the paper for a publishing manager in Gaborone. He wanted me to apply so I could go and stay with him in Gaborone. I've done it, but I'm not sure I want the job.
I have been a full time writer now for about three years and before that I owned my own business for ten years so it's been a long time since I was an employee. And I'm not really someone who can do things halfway. I can't say I'll take the job and write too. If I take the job I intend to give them my time. So it will be two years of very little writing. I've just really started building up solid relationships with my publishers and I am fearful this could back track my good work so far.
At the same time my husband has been my biggest supporter in every way. Perhaps it's time I give a bit back. It's all keeping my head spinning. In any case, I've only sent my CV; they may not even call me for an interview and then they may meet me and see I'm not what they want. I'm trying not to worry about anything. Trying to wait for the bridges to appear before I see how I'm going to get across. But I can't help feeling a bit sad about it all.